Jokes » Snake jokes
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"So glad to meet you" said the Hindu politely? "Charmed I'm sure ", replied the snake ! A old snake goes to see his Doctor. "Doc, I need something for my eyes. . . can't see well these days". The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks. The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he's very depressed. Doc says, "What's the problem. . . didn't the glasses help you?" "The glasses are fine doc, I just discovered I've been living with a water hose the past 2 years!" Did you hear about the stupid snake? He lost his skin. Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a python. Oh you can't get round me like that, you know. Have you heard about the slippery eel? Didn't think so, you wouldn't be able to grasp it !sna Q: What kind of snake is good at math?A: An adder.
Q:What do you get when you cross a snake and a kangaroo? A:('A jump rope')" There where two snakes talking. The 1st one said 'Sidney, are we the type of snakes who wrap ourselves around our prey and squeeze and crush until they're dead? Or are we the type of snake who ambush our prey and bite them and they are poisioned?'. Then the second Snake says "Why do you ask?" The 1st one replies: "I just bit my lip!" What did one snake say to another? Hiss off ! What did the mother snake say to her crying baby? Stop crying and viper your nose ! What did the snake say to the cornered rat? Hiss is the end of the line for you ! What did the snake say when another asked him the time? Don't asp me ! What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese? Thanks, I'll just have a sliver ! What do most people do when they see a python? They re-coil ! What do snakes have on their bath towels? Hiss and Hers ! What do you call a python with a great bedside manner? A snake charmer ! What do you call a snake that informs the police? A grass snake ! What do you call a snake that is trying to become a bird? A feather boa !sna What do you call a snake who works for the governement? A civil serpent ! What do you do if you find a black mamba in your toilet? Wait until he's finished. What do you get if crossed a new born snake with a basketball? A bouncing baby boa ! What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a cupboard of food? Snakes and Larders !sna What do you get if you cross a glow-worm with a python? A twenty-foot-long strip-light that can squeeze you to death. What do you get if you cross a snake and a hotdog? A fangfurter !sna What do you get if you cross a snake and a lego set? A boa constructor !Page: 1 :: 2 :: 3